“I feel… unwell,” he whispered, holding a glitter-covered milkshake.
“Now,” Honey said. “You’re going to lead.”
Honey hopped off the unicycle. “When’s the last time you did something that scared you?”
The Blondes exchanged a look. Then they grinned. 2 Hot Blondes The Lesson John Persons
John had never heard of them. He’d only won their seminar ticket in a raffle he entered by accident, thinking it was for a free set of non-stick frying pans.
The Blondes cheered. A security guard yelled at them. They ran, laughing, down the ramp, John’s heart hammering with something he hadn’t felt in years: delight.
That was before the Blondes.
“John Persons,” Saffron said, reading his name off a lanyard. “Your energy is screaming for help.”
Not “blondes” as in a hair color. The Blondes —a duo named Saffron and Honey, who ran a traveling pop-up seminar called “Unlocking Your Inner Chaos: A Lesson in Living Loud.” They were famous on social media for glitter-bombing stuffy boardrooms and teaching CEOs to dance the macarena during quarterly earnings calls.
The lesson was held in an abandoned roller rink. Neon lights flickered. A bass thrummed through the floor. Saffron, sharp and witty, wore a sequined jumpsuit. Honey, softer but equally wild, balanced on a unicycle while juggling rubber chickens. “When’s the last time you did something that scared you
The climax of the lesson came at sunset. They stood on the roof of a parking garage overlooking the city. Saffron handed John a kazoo. Honey held a boombox playing a ridiculous polka.
He kept the kazoo on his desk. Just in case.
He put the kazoo to his lips and played a wobbly, ridiculous, joyful noise. He’d only won their seminar ticket in a
They spent the next three hours dismantling John’s life.